Tag Archives: Mommy

Pregnancy Gender Myths

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I haven’t had any telltale feeling as to what the sex of this baby is.  In the beginning, I felt it was a girl, but with how different I feel this time around, I’m not sure.  With the Princess I could have sworn I was having a boy but everyone around me said “No, you are carrying high so it’s a girl.”  Turns out they were right.  The Princess would like our Rainbow to be a Prince, but I’ve been getting mixed reviews from people.  Some say boy, others say girl.  In the beginning of February, I will finally know.

We’ve all heard them.  The old wives tales people tell to determine prior to an ultrasound or the big day what the sex of the child will be.  Science has debunked a majority of them, but it’s for fun. So here are a few;

  • How you carry.  If you are carrying high, then it’s a girl.  If you carry low, then it’s a boy.
  • Heartbeats.  If the heartbeat is higher than 140, it’s a girl.  If it is lower than 140, it’s a boy.
  • Cravings.  People say that if you are craving something sweet, it’s a girl, but if you are craving sour, then it’s a boy.  Maybe there is something behind “sugar and spice, and everything nice.”
  • Weight Gain.  If your Hubby gains weight, then it’s a girl, but if he doesn’t gain a pound, then it’s a boy.
  • Your Face.  Apparently, if your face becomes round and rosy, then you are carrying a girl.  If not, it’s a boy.
  • Acne.  If you develop acne during pregnancy, then it’s a girl.  Some suggest it’s from extra female hormones.  If not, then obviously, it’s a boy!

So according to these myths I will be having a boy, so in a few weeks I will be able to say whether or not they are right.  A study was done, 71% of the time, mother’s guessed correctly the sex of their unborn baby.  While I’m not sure, I will go with my original feeling and say a girl.

How to Beat a Cold While Pregnant

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Hey everyone!  I have been posting pretty sparsely lately and it is because since Christmas, I have been battling a nasty chest and sinus cold and it seems to be lingering like an old boyfriend.  Apparently while visiting family and friends, Christmas joy wasn’t the only thing I caught.  I’ve been to the doctor and he basically confirmed what I already knew; I’m pregnant and there isn’t much in the way of medication that I can take to ease your symptoms.  So not only can I not take anything, but my immune system is on hiatus as well.  Pregnant women are more susceptible to colds and viruses as their immune system has taken a back seat as not to identify the baby as a foreign body.  I’ve been treating this cold naturally and here are a few things that you can do while pregnant to ease your symptoms.

  1. Ginger Root.  Not only will this help ease upset stomach (and morning sickness) but chewing on ginger root will release enzymes that will help suppress your cough.
  2. Halls.  My doctor told me these are ok as long as they are the menthol ones and do not contain medication.  Try to limit your intake, but the menthol will open nasal passages and help you breathe as well as soothe your sore throat.
  3. Hot Steam.  Boil water and pour it in a bowl.  Then place a towel over your head and breathe it in.  The heat will help break up any congestion you may have.
  4. Rest.  Nothing can help you feel better than catching some Zz’s.  Your body is already exhausted from growing a baby and battling a cold will only make you more tired.  So feel free to sleep when you can.
  5. See your doctor.  Seems pretty obvious but when pregnant and sick, it’s always best to see your doctor.  They’ll know what’s the next best move.

 

Image c/o clevelandleader.com

Image c/o clevelandleader.com

I’m not a doctor, so before following these tips, always check with your healthcare provider first!

2 Pregnancies, 2 Very Different Experiences.

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Today I went for some genetic testing to ensure that everything with my Rainbow is going well.  At first I was very nervous because the technician wouldn’t show me the screen.  She then told me that my “baby is not cooperating.”  Noooo that couldn’t possibly be a trait that my children have.  *Cue awkward silence*  Needless to say that whenever she tried to measure the nasal bone, the baby would either hide it’s face or roll over.  Once everything was measured, she let me look at the screen.  There I saw the flicker of the heartbeat, and this squirmy little joy using my womb as a romper room.

After I left the clinic, I began to compare the differences between this pregnancy and my pregnancy with the Princess.  They are entirely different in almost all aspects thus far.

 

PREGNANCY WITH THE PRINCESS

  • We don’t like to say “accident” but the Princess was an “unexpected surprise.”
  • Symptoms occurred almost instantly
  • Little nausea but vomited for 7 months
  • Heartburn and swollen feet were the only other symptoms
  • Gained a whopping 40 lbs
  • Felt like it was a boy, but a girl it was
  • Delivered the Princess via emergency c-section

 

PREGNANCY WITH THIS RAINBOW

  • Planned after 2 1/2 years of trying, 2 miscarriages and secondary infertility
  • Little vomiting but extreme nausea to the point where food repulses me
  • Tender chest, heartburn, blotchy dry skin, bleeding gums, bloody noses every morning, a round ligament tear, pregnancy insomnia and fatigue
  • I have lost 10 lbs thus far
  • People keep telling me it’s a boy, but I feel like it will be another girl
  • I will be attempting a VBAC
Baby Rainbow at 13 weeks

Baby Rainbow at 13 weeks

Princess us

Baby Princess at 20 weeks

November Goals Revisited

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As usual, every month I make goals for myself and then revisit them at the beginning of the next month.  I made my list of goals for November, and here they are revisited.

  1. Plan a fantastic birthday for the Princess.  Her birthday was a hit, with lots of friends and family present.  The theme was dancing as the Princess has been in dance class since September.  A ballerina cake, lots of yummy food and good company always makes for a great time.
  2. Plan a romantic night for me and Hubby’s 6 year anniversary.  I am all about quality over quantity, so instead of spending hundred’s of dollars on gifts and a night out, we made our own special dinner, bought dessert and then sat down and played a board game.  We laughed, reminisced about the last 6 years and discussed the next 6.  We finished off the night with a romantic movie.  It was a really great night.
  3. Post more frequently than I did the last month.  I think I posted more often but I haven’t checked how many I posted in October versus November.
  4. Craft something for the upcoming holidays.  I crafted a Christmas Tree door ornament.
  5. Plan a Girl’s Day for me and the Princess.  The Princess and I enjoyed a living room slumber party filled with snacks and our always favourite go-to movie series; Harry Potter!

Tattle Tales: The Moral Compass of a 4 Year Old

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The Princess has been officially labelled “The sheriff” of her kindergarten class.  She stands behind her teacher at circle time and “scowls” at the children that are not listening to the teacher.  And everyday I receive a play-by-play of the events of the day.  I have a tattle tale.  At first I became slightly concerned by this behaviour, as frankly, no one really likes a tattle tale.   Then upon researching, I came to find out that developmentally, this is exactly what she is to be doing.  In a 4 year old’s social development, tattling on friends is just another normal, while irritating, stage that unfortunately lasts for about a year.

Children at this age are very aware of rules and don’t necessarily like it when other children do not follow them, so they tattle.  Sometimes they are being picked on or bullied, so they tattle.  What is a parent to do?  I have tried to explain that unless someone is getting hurt or is hurting her directly, the consequences of that behaviour is none of her concern.  I also have tried to teach her to try to solve these said issues without asking for an adult to intervene.   I understand that her tattling is her way of navigating her moral compass.  When someone else shoves, or curses or does something deemed “inappropriate” she is sure to let people know that it is “bad”.  I feel comforted at least that I know that she has a grasp of right and wrong, I just have to curb the tattling behaviour.

Did your children tattle and how did you change that behaviour?

Happy 4th Birthday Princess!

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How time has flown by.  It was 4 years ago today that my precious sweet little girl was born.  Born at 7:56 am, weighing 7 lbs, 5 oz and an amazing 21 inches long, my Princess came into this world looking just like her Daddy.  She had a single curl right in the middle of her forehead (a precursor to the personality we would see later) and had wrinkly hands and feet from being overdue.

It was November 9th when my water broke. Hubby looked at me pleadingly, and I said “My water just broke.”  I called the hospital.  They asked if I had any contractions which I didn’t.  They told me to walk to try to bring them on, and if in 24 hours there were still no contractions, I was to come in for an induction.  So on the Monday, Hubby and I walked, and walked, and walked some more.  I had some slight cramping, but nothing that alerted me to what I presumed contractions to feel like.  That night we went to the hospital and they did an ultrasound.  I had lost some fluid, but not all and I was to be admitted.  They gave me Pitocin to start the labour.  It took roughly 4 hours before I felt anything.  The first one, I thought, “this isn’t so bad.” By 1 o’clock, the rest of my water broke.   The pains intensified greatly after that and I began to wonder how women had the ability to yell at their spouses.  I could not utter a word.   I sounded like a dying walrus.  I had never been in labour before, and perhaps I was naïve to believe that the doctors would provide me with some guidance as to how I should do it properly.  I only saw a doctor once or twice, it was mainly the nurses that attended to me.  They  told me to lie in bed, had numerous IV’s coming out of my arms and I was constantly hooked up to a fetal monitor.  I had spoken with OBGYN prior to this and we had discussed pain medications.  I really wanted a natural birth, and I didn’t want an epidural headache so I really did not want to get an epidural.  She told me that she could offer me gas, or nubane as other pain management options  By the time I was in full fledge labour, the nurse asked me what I wanted.  I asked for the gas.  She simply replied, “No, you can get an epidural, or a hot and cold compress.”  I looked at her bewildered.  Why would my doctor say that wasn’t a problem, but this nurse said it was.  While pregnant, they pumped me full of nubane, percocets, oxycontin, morphine and Demerol to ease my pain. Yet now, they were only offering a hot and cold compress.  Maybe it was because she was a night nurse and did not want to listen to my moaning or what I would later learn was that this hospital was not a great one to labour at.  She kept pushing the epidural on me, telling me it would speed my labour and that I would feel nothing.  I had always heard that epidural generally slow labour but why would a nurse lie to me? She went to school, surely she would know the truth.  Finally I conceded, and they brought in the anesthesiologist who they swore was “the best we have.”  They lied.  He hit the left side of my spine twice and the right side once before actually getting it in.  It was excruciating.  Finally once the drugs kicked in, I was able to sleep.  But at 5 am, I could start to feel pain in my left hip.  I had told the nurse that I was in quite a bit of pain, and that my hip was hurting me.  She told me it was a bed sore.  I asked, “I have an epidural, I shouldn’t feel anything.”   She walked away pretending like she didn’t even hear my comment.

By 7 am, The Princess went into distress and I was wheeled away for an emergency c-section.  It happened so fast that I can barely remember the conversation.  They told Hubby to leave the room as they had administer the anaesthesia.  Since I had the epidural, they couldn’t give me a spinal.  So they simply gave me more epidural medication.  They poked me with a needle in the wrist than in the belly and asked “Do you feel pressure, or pain?” It was the same pain.  Then after giving me more, they wiped a wet cloth on my wrist and then my stomach and asked if it was the same feeling.  There was no difference between the sensation of my wrist and the one on my stomach.  They repeated with ice chips and continually told them I could feel my abdomen.  I guess they just believed that with the amount of medication they had given me that there was no way  I could possibly feel anything.  They decided to cut anyway.  I screamed as the scalpel sliced me open and proceeded to vomit and scream “Please stop, that hurts.” The doctors words to me were “We can see the head.” I continued to vomit and scream as it was like being in the movie Hostel or Saw and being awake while being cut open.  Then they realized that there was perhaps I wasn’t exaggerating.  They told my husband to come say goodbye to me.  I was to be put completely under.  I cried as he looked at me and I would later find out they stopped him before he entered the door and asked, “Which one would you want us to save?”

It was 1 pm that afternoon when I finally got to hold her.  She was the most beautiful baby I had ever seen.  Her rosy cheeks, little fingers and toes, I had never felt such immediate and pure love and joy before.  She was mine.  All the waiting and complications were all worth it just to be able to hold her.   I kept telling everyone how beautiful she was.  That was all I could say for about an hour.  I was in complete wonder.  I still am.  Every day she grows and I see more and more, and learn as she learns.  She has grown and so have I.

She has given Hubby and I such immense joy over the last 4 years.  A wild personality, strong-willed but kind and loving, my Princess is our entire world.  I was truly blessed to be given such a wondrous little girl.  We have witnessed her first words, first steps, first tooth, first time eating food, first tears, first smiles, laughs and hugs & kisses.  The Princess made us a family and we are forever grateful.  Happy Birthday my sweet girl.  We love you so much!

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For the Love of Reading

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We’ve been having our share of up’s and down’s with school, but Princess had a great day today.  When I picked her up, I asked her how her day was.  She had the biggest grin on her face and triumphantly told me that she had reading buddies today.  Once a week, a grade 4 student comes to her class and they are paired up and read to the Kindergarten students.  With all the stuff that has been going on, I can’t express how overjoyed I am that she has found something that makes her happy.

Since the Princess was a baby, I have been reading to her.  She has a collection of books and I read to her every night.  Her tastes vary.  Some nights she wants Goosebumps or Harry Potter, Goodnight Moon or Dr. Seuss.  I am an avid reader myself.  The multi-sensory experience of it gives me immense pleasure and I am glad that the Princess is finding joy in it too.  I’m sure that Princess will read books that I think are literary garbage but as long as she is reading than I cannot complain.  My mom always read true crime novels and I prefered the literary classics such as Byron and Shakespeare.  I am varying my tastes a bit and reading books I maybe would not have read before.  I hope that the Princess’ joy of reading continues as the benefits of reading are tremendous and here are just a few of them.

  1. A stronger relationship between the reader and the person being read to.
  2. Academic excellence.
  3. Basic speech skills
  4. The basics of how to read a book.
  5. Better communication skills.
  6. Mastery of language.
  7. More logical thinking skills.
  8. Acclamation to new experiences.
  9. Enhanced concentration and discipline.
  10. That reading is fun and can take you to places and meet people you would not meet in the real world!

Last Day of Daycare

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Today marks the Princess’ last day of daycare.  It will be the last time we will be up early to travel via the transit system, it will be the last time I will be waking up and coming home in the dark during the Canadian winter months.  It will be the last time she will see her teacher’s and old friends before she begins a new journey in school where she will meet new teachers and friends.    I am so very proud of the little girl she has become and firmly believe that the wonderful staff definitely had a helping hand in that.  They were there for all her sicknesses, all her happy moments and her bruised knees.  She was able to go on trips, go see plays and have experiences that she may not have had, had I stayed home instead of going back to work.   While she did manage to contract all viruses and bacteria that came through that place, but her immune system is rock solid now, just in time for school.  We’d all hate to see her miss a day at school.

Faces of Loss

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As many of you know, I lost my angel baby Emery on March 25th, 2011.  It has been 16 months since I lost her, but I still cry myself to sleep.  I was never prepared for what came after.  The doctors never gave me any pamphlets on bereavement and I didn’t have much of a support group.  Most people didn’t know what to say, or never mentioned it again.  For a long time, it seemed like everyone else had moved on, but I was stuck.  The doctors had sent me home to pass her despite my requests for a D&C and on the 25th, I held my lifeless little girl in the palm of my hand.  I wouldn’t wish that on my worst enemy.  That was one of the most devastating moments of my life.  But it seemed that only I was really affected.  No one else was grieving like I was.  I didn’t know anyone who had suffered a miscarriage and I kept getting told “just get over it, move on.”

Now most people know that if you mix baking soda and vinegar in a bottle then put the cap on, eventually the pressure would cause the top to blow.  I was that bottle for quite some time.  Everyone kept giving me the “stop being negative, it was only a miscarriage, at least you have a child.”  And for a long time I kept how I was feeling to myself.  Everyone else was over it, maybe so should I.  But I had this nagging feeling that I wasn’t crazy, that maybe I was supposed to be this upset.  That was my daughter, I had carried her throughout her entire life.  From the moment of the positive pregnancy test, everything was about her.  My body was her safe vessel and I was the captain.  She breathed through me, was fed through me, lived in me.  Every thought I had, was in regards to her safety and well-being just as I did with my Princess.  And when she left us, I mourned her like I would anyone I loved.  But despite the short time we had together, I loved her whole-heartedly.  So every time someone would tell me how I was to feel, I would blow my top like my insides were baking soda and their comments were the vinegar and have a full on meltdown.  And then I was told I was the crazy one.  Had I lost a living child, would my grief been justified?  Was Emery a second-class citizen because she died before she left my womb?  And because of that, did she deserve a second-class mourning?  I grieved alone because no one else would mourn her.

It wasn’t until her angelversary that I knew I had to do something about this.  I was growing more and more angry with people.  Why didn’t they understand?  Who were they to tell me to let go of my daughter?  You let go of someone who love and tell me how it feels when someone says to get over it.  I knew I needed to find something or someone who understood.  I began searching the internet for groups and people telling their stories and I found Faces of Loss.  I was looking through its Groups page and I was able to find one in Toronto.   I messaged the group leader and last night I went to my very first meeting.  I have never felt more accepted.  These women understand my heartache and my grief and all those crazy thoughts that went through my mind.  They gave me ideas as to how to communicate with Hubby, how to grieve and ways that I could commemorate Emery’s life.  I am so grateful for this group and wanted to write about it so that if there are any other women out there looking for support, it IS out there.

The Princess’ First Trip to the Dentist

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My Princess had her very first dentist appointment and she did wonderfully.  I had some trepidations about taking her to the dentist because let’s be honest, who likes going to the dentist?  I tried to make it sound as fun as possible, and had her and I play dentist at home to semi-prepare her for what was to come.  When I booked the appointment, they said that it would last approximately 40 minutes, but very rarely did the children ever stay in the chair that long.  They assured me they would try to make it as comfortable as possible and they would give her a toy at the end.  I was sort of jealous, I never got toys when I went as a kid.

Princess seemed very excited about it when we told her.  I think she thought of it as a spa or something.  So when we arrived and the hygienist came out, Princess walked right up to her and gave her a hug.  I was floored.  They took her to the chair and let her play with it, raising it higher and lowering it.  They they introduced her to the tools, aptly named Mr. Tickles, Mr. Thirsty (Princess’ favourite), Mr. Sunshine, and Mr. Water.  Needless to say, Princess made it through the entire sitting without so much as a fuss.  The pediatric dentist said that all her teeth looked great which was a great relief as Princess is a thumb-sucker.

As a gift, the dentist gave her a big bag of toothy gifts such as a Princess toothbrush and toothpaste for the “Sugar Bugs”, kid floss, hair clips, a toy, a tooth-shaped timer and a big photo of herself holding Barney’s toothbrush.  Now she loves brushing her teeth and is always sure to flip the timer on each brushing.