“Eat up, you’re eating for two now.” We’ve all heard it, you have to eat more when you’re pregnant and weight gain is in the forefront of every woman’s mind. With the Princess, I gained a whopping 40 pounds, most of it to my face, feet and back side. I exploded. My friends giggled when we’d go out for dinner and I would shout at them “I can only waddle so fast,” while trying to beat the clock at the cross walk. With our Rainbow, I’ve only gained 6 pounds. Drastic difference from 40. I’ve been to the doctor numerous times and constantly asked if something was wrong. He assured me that our Baby Boy is big and strong and healthy and weight gain in pregnancy is all relative.
I’ve had lots of people ask me if I am eating enough, even eating at all and have had them constantly stuff food in front of me trying to get me to eat. I eat. I don’t stop myself from eating when I’m hungry, I eat what I’m supposed to. I eat healthier though. Instead of consuming bagels and cream cheese for breakfast, I eat a smoothie and a piece of multigrain toast with peanut butter. And for cravings, I’ve been downing ice water like it’s no one’s business. While with the Princess, I gave into every single craving I had, and there were many.
According to most doctors, the general rule is if you are underweight, you should gain somewhere between 28 to 40 lbs., 25-35 lbs. if you are average weight, and 15-20 lbs. if you are overweight. My doctor also said that women who are severely overweight shouldn’t gain any weight at all. So never mind all that stuff about eating twice as much when pregnant, instead eat twice as healthy.
It happens every night at 8:30. Boredom kicks in. And then comes the cravings. I have been really good at pushing them away and not giving in. But they are persistent. I’m craving ice cream. Delicious ice cream. I try and distract myself from thinking about it.
I do the dishes. Hmm, the bowls are clean, what better way to dirty them than with ice cream.
I fold and refold the Rainbow’s clothing. I organize and reorganize his drawers. Then I see the bib with an ice cream cone on it.
I could always go for a walk. And then again Baskin Robbins is only a 5 minute walk from our home.
I read a book. What would make reading this book better? Eating ice cream.
I watch TV show. And of course I watch the Food Network and what’s on? Ice cream.
Hubby and I have a conversation and without fail it always turns into a game of Rock Paper Scissors as to who is doing the ice cream run.
Even as we speak, I am writing a post and what is it about…ICE CREAM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I am now 32 weeks pregnant now and the birth planning has begun. From day one, I knew I wanted to attempt a VBAC. I had an emergency C-section with the Princess and I would be lying if I said it was an enjoyable experience. A botched epidural lead to an improper block which caused me to feel the doctors cut me open and ultimately being put under. It took hours to come out of the anaesthesia and I wasn’t able to hold my baby until she was over 5 hours old.
When I became pregnant with the Princess, I perhaps foolishly assumed that I would deliver naturally, no drugs and tough it out like many of the women in my family. My sister, who is a nurse, warned me not to become so rigid in my birth plans in case something were to happen and things didn’t turn out the way I planned. Those prophetic words still hang with me today. Needless to say, I was devastated by having a C-section. That isn’t to say that I’m not grateful for the Princess being born safely. It upset me that I had to stay in the hospital for 4 days, that I gave in and had an epidural, that I didn’t deliver my baby the way “nature intended.” I felt like a failure. And it’s not that anyone else made me feel that way, it was a pressure and expectation I put on myself. Somehow I had convinced myself that I was in control, that I would labour and deliver my baby.
Now that we near our due date, I am finding myself having those expectations again. And I am fully aware that my ability to deliver naturally is only 50/50. Not really great odds. Perhaps it is out of fear of another botched C-section (despite going to a different doctor and hospital) and the fact that this pregnancy has been a relative breeze compared to my pregnancy with the Princess that gives me the unrealistic hope that this time, this time I’ll do it. With a VBAC however, there is a chance of uterine rupture and often doctors will suggest an epidural in case a C-section is necessary. Also, if I have to be induced, like I was with the Princess, a C-section will be the only option. I can say with certainty I really really do not want a C-section. I’ve already spoken with my doctor and I have made it quite clear that if I do have to, I want to be out. He is aware of what happened last time and seems to be in agreement. At the same time, I have to weigh the possibility of uterine rupture (which is rare) and the consequences of that. My doctor seems confident that I am a good candidate for a VBAC and I may get my wish. I am trying my best not to get my hopes up and just take things as they come, but things are easier said than done.
Ever since reading “We Need to Talk About Kevin”, Lionel Shriver has been on my go-to author whenever I feel like having my ideas and opinions turned upside down. She has an innate ability to take taboo subjects that people often shy away from and rub their faces in it. She treats her readers as an etch-a-sketch, imprinted with their experiences and then shakes them with her words, leaving them a blank slate to be re-written on. “The New Republic” received scathing reviews from a lot of people, but I enjoyed it. Sure there were some characters I felt could have been left out, but the very idea driving the novel was what kept me turning the pages. A satire on terrorism, this is not for the faint of heart. She puts a social commentary on terrorism. While most people see the act of terrorism itself, Shriver makes you a witness to the dealings in the background. Dark, politically eye-opening, “The New Republic” will make you question your very trust in elected officials, the media and how it spins world events. For my full review, click here.
“In comes Edgar Kellogg. A former fat boy and lawyer turned freelance journalist, looking to escape his second string complex and finally get his big break. Much to his chagrin, he is charged with finding out was happened to his predecessor, Barrington Sadler, who disappeared while reporting on the SOB (Os Soldado Ousados de Barba) who claim international bombing. When Kellogg arrives, his complex comes back with full force as he finds that everyone cannot stop talking about the infamous Barrington Sadler. It isn’t long before Edgar realizes there is more to Saddler than all rumours his fellow Rat Pack spew. Bombings, international recognition and effect on local policy increase, and soon it isn’t long before things begin to spiral.”
April is fun! The very first day is April Fool’s,
A day for playing jokes.
All month long the weather teases.
Now it’s warm, then oops! the sneezes!
Take off your boots and it will shower:
Then the sun shines for an hour.
Robins are nesting, puddles are skiddy, violets pop!
No wonder April’s gay and funny –
You know who’s coming? The Easter Bunny!
By Patricia Scarry
I woke up with a gray hair right on the top of my head. I’m only 27 and thought to myself “I’m too young for this.” But after this first, I know why. The Princess was invited to a birthday party today and like all the other parties, parents are welcome to stay. Not this one. I was not at all prepared for it. In all the correspondence I had with the Mom, not once did she mention that parents were not to stay. So when the Princess and I arrived, she took the Princess’ jacket and informed me pick up time was at 3:30. I must have had a bizarre look on my face. I choked a little bit and then went and said my goodbye’s to the Princess and informed her I would be back later. I walked outside and immediately called Hubby.
“They won’t let me stay. I don’t feel right about this. She’s only 4,” I stammered, holding back the tears.
He agreed that it was a little weird but said she’d probably be ok.
So like a crazy woman, I went to the coffee shop across the street and watched through the window. I constantly watched my clock and then made periodical walk-by’s. In my opinion, 4 years old is not old enough to be left alone. I’m sure I looked crazy but it’s my job to keep her safe.
At 3:15, I picked her up early and she was just fine. So despite walking up and down the street, holding back the tears, the Princess survived her first birthday party without me.
This day keeps getting better. Not only is it Saturday, we found out our Rainbow is measuring a full week ahead of schedule and I’ve also been nominated for the Leibster Blog Award by Cristina from Diary of a Desert Fox.
So here is how it works. Once you’ve been nominated, you have to post 11 things about yourself, answer 11 questions from the person who nominated you and pass it on. Choose 11 people to award and create 11 questions for them.
11 THINGS ABOUT ME
- I have a thing about series, books, movies, tv shows etc. Once I start I have to finish them even if they are horrible. Sometimes it’s a good things, sometimes it’s self-inflicted torture.
- I have to order things from biggest to smallest. The books on our shelves are arranged and I will take the time to line them up. It drives Hubby crazy, but it gives me some sense of peace. I’m weird, I know.
- Broccoli is my favourite vegetable. My mom said when I was a child I would eat it out of the bag before we would even get to the cash.
- I have an eclectic taste in music. On my music player you will find country, classic rock, celtic, R&B, Popand even bagpipe music.
- I have not listened to the radio in over 2 years. I dislike a majority of today’s music. Too processed and packaged in my opinion.
- I had a psychic tell me I would die at the age of 80 by the way of heart attack.
- I share a birthday with John Grisham and Jules Verne.
- I’m a Daddy’s Girl through and through.
- My daughter is named after my sisters.
- Fuzzy Peaches, Lik-a-Maid’s and Reece’s Peanut Butter Cups are my favourite candy.
- My daughter was born on Rememberance Day and our Rainbow is due on Father’s Day.
11 QUESTIONS FROM DIARY OF A DESERT FOX
- Why do you blog? I started blogging in 2012 that combined by two favourite passions, writing and being a mom.
- What advice would you give to a new writer? Set time aside everyday and write. It could be about nothing in particular, just keep writing.
- Why do you think I nominated you? What a loaded questions LOL I’m not sure, maybe because you have a Mom & Baby section on your blog as well.
- What’s your favorite way to escape? Going for a walk and listening to music and tuning the world out. Reading is another great escape for me.
- If I were to spend 24 hours in your city/country, where would you advise I go? Anywhere downtown. Toronto has so much to offer. Queen West is always a treat, so is Yonge Dundas Square and not to mention the ROM, CN Tower, Steamwhistle Brewery and the AGO.
- I know I haven’t heard it all. Tell me a funny/weird/unexpected question you’ve been asked while in a foreign country. While traveling in Spain, I was asked if Canadians really ‘believe’ that the War of 1812 really happened.
- What is your fondest memory? Prior to my dad going back to school to become a Geological Surveyor, he used to drive Big Rigs. He used to take me on week long trips. We’d travel all over Ontario and Quebec, go to restaurants, talk and listen to music. My earliest memory is of me in the truck. He was sleeping in the bunks and I was 2 years old and I woke up and started playing with the air brakes. They were in the shapes and colours of blue triangles, red square and yellow hexagon. So in my defense, it wasn’t my fault.
- What’s the scariest thing you’ve ever done? I’m all about self-preservation, but a friend once convinced me to go into the sketchiest bar in Toronto (in my opinion). It was in a dangerous area where shootings and stabbings were common, but she lived in the area and felt comfortable. Walking in, the people at the door warned us we “were at the wrong bar”. I have never been so terrified before in my life. I was certain we would be attacked.
- What is the one thing you have always wanted to do but never have? Do a poetry reading. I have a terrible fear of speaking in public. I once went to a book reading of one of my favourite author’s and got up the nerve to ask her a question, but I ended up blurting it out quickly and then ran away. When she signed my book, I stuttered uncontrollably.
- What song defines your life? Midnight Train by Journey. I wouldn’t say any one song defines my life, but it’s definitely very relevant. I am from a small town and lived on a farm and my Hubby is a city boy through and through. Also, whenever that song comes on, our daughter starts dancing uncontrollably and at a restaurant once she started fist pumping in her booster seat.
- If you were an animal, what would you be and why? A tiger. There is something majestic about them that has always interested me.
My 11 Nominations
MY 11 QUESTIONS
- If you were President of the World, what laws would you make?
- If you were a Superhero, what power would you have?
- What would your dream holiday be?
- What do you find rewarding about blogging?
- Do you think that cursive writing is a skill all children should have?
- If you could go back in time and change one thing, what would it be?
- What would be your best achievement to date?
- If you could, would you want to be a celebrity?
- When you were younger, what did you want to be when you grew up?
- Why did you start blogging?
- If you could ask your future self 1 question, what would it be?
Everyone says that you get less Zz’s while pregnant but the dreams you do have are much more vivid when pregnant. Many believe that the additional hormones are to blame for the heavier dream load and the constant tossing and turning makes you interrupt the REM cycle therefore remembering more dreams in sometimes more vivid details. I have been having my fair share of bizarre dreams and here are just a few.
- Very early on I had a dream that I gave birth early to a baby boy (psychic maybe?) and he was deformed but my Dad was cuddling him nonetheless. Apparently these dreams represent an anxiety about the babies health. It is likely since early on we were worried we would lose it, my subconscious was going into worry overdrive.
- This one was truly weird but I dreamt that Hubby and I were camping on a beach and the entire campsite was being attacked by Bigfoot. We tried to trap it with a dummy made out of carrot (???) but it ended up just throwing carrot sticks at us. Then somehow the Bigfoot pushed a woman into the water where she was circled by sharks. Dream decipherers believe that dreams of being attacked by animals, albeit fictitious animals, represents a fear of vulnerability. Or I ate too many Tums before bed.
- Lately I’ve been dreaming about loved ones that have passed on. My Nan, Grandparents, Aunts and Uncles, and last night dreamt of my family dog I had as a kid, have been a mainstay in my dreams. Some may not believe this, but I like to believe that people we love will visit us in our dreams to let us know things will be ok. However, dreams of relatives who have passed away may be the subconscious’ way of connecting the old and new generations. But it usually leaves me reaching for tissues when I wake up. Hormones and sad memories equal a whole box of Kleenex used and in the trash.
- I have also had very vivid dreams about certain people in popular culture. I had a dream I was on tour with the Jonas Brother’s, whose music I have never listened to and then the other night I had a very realistic dream about Snooki. Somehow the cast of Jersey Shore (a show I don’t watch) and I were visiting my sister who was building a house. I then turned to Snooki and said “It is a sad thing that future generations will look back and realize you would be considered an influential person during that time.” It’s even more sad when you wake up and realize that is true.
What crazy dreams did you have when you were expecting?
I am happy to announce we are in our final stretch of this pregnancy. We are now 29 weeks pregnant and so far everything has gone well. We did have a bit of a scare a few weeks ago with some unexpected light bleeding, chest pains and fainting, but after going to the hospital (better safe than sorry), our Rainbow is doing really well and I am ok. Turns out baby is sitting really low and sitting on a nerve, cutting off blood supply which caused the chest pains and fainting. I now have to be constantly moving, like I’m not tired enough, to encourage blood flow throughout. But overall baby boy is kicking like crazy, my dreams are more and more vivid, and we are anxiously awaiting his arrival.
It’s hard to believe that time is flying as fast as it is and that it won’t be too long before I’m off on maternity leave, holding my baby boy and chasing after my very active little girl. I have fears of how I’m going to handle two children, a newborn who’ll be up all night and an early riser 4 year old who will be up all day. In the end, I cannot wait to add to our family and start another chapter of our life.